Elimination communication: how to toilet train a newborn baby
Most children are toilet or potty trained by the age of three. But there are some doing it a bit sooner. From birth. This is the practice of Elimination Communication. Also called infant potty training and Nappy Free. I could only potty train my toddler by using chocolate bribes, which is definitely not suitable for newborns. So how do you do this? And, perhaps the much, much bigger question - why?
Disposable nappies have only been around since the Fifties. Mass-produced reusable nappies arrived in 1887 and before this swaddling was used. In ancient times parents made use of moss, grass and animal skins. But in developing countries, elimination communication has been the norm. While the name makes it sound like something invented by an Apprentice contestant, it’s been around for as long as babies have.
WHAT EXACTLY IS ELIMINATION COMMUNICATION?
You use your intuition and respond to learned cues that your baby is about to poo or wee. They are then placed in a special squatting position on the toilet or potty. There are definitely no chocolate bribes involved. It can be done part-time or exclusively. Or never. Obviously.
what are the benefits of elimination communication?
Advocates of elimination communication claim it helps to develop a deeper bond with your child. There have been no studies that back up this claim. I suppose if you’re staring at your baby’s face for most of the day trying to work out if it’s a smile, wind or a poo coming – there may be some positive effects. Unless your baby gets sick of the sight of you.
Fans of this practice also say the child is happier and more comfortable without a bulky, often wet nappy and also much less likely to suffer from nappy rash.
It will definitely mean saving money. Parents that use disposable nappies will spend hundreds of pounds on them. But these savings may be offset by having to have the carpet, sofa, rugs, curtains, cushions, throws, blankets, duvets etc professionally cleaned.
The environment probably benefits the most from this nappy-free technique. With no need for nappies and much less need for wipes - there’s a lot less sitting in landfill for the next 500 years.
It may also mean less laundry if you had been planning to use reusable nappies. Although you may find yourself washing a lot more clothes at first. Especially your own.
But perhaps the biggest benefit is you might not ever have to deal with a poo that’s gone all the way up your baby’s back. That in itself might be reason enough to try it.
Really nervous for this guy’s hand.
HOW DO YOU DO ELIMINATION COMMUNICATION?
There are four main ways.
You are alert for any cues that your baby makes when they are about to poo or wee. It will probably take a while to learn these. I never even managed to work out what all the different cries meant but some parents are more intuitive than others.
You learn what your baby’s toilet triggers are. For example, some need to go when they wake up or after a feed.
You routinely take them to a potty to give them a chance to use it.
You encourage them to respond to a certain word or sound. This could be ‘Psss’, ‘Mm-mm’ or ‘Pineapple’. (Only the first two are recommended by experts. I threw in pineapple as I like the idea of a baby who will only defecate when they hear this word.) You could also teach your child to use baby sign language to indicate when they need to go.
It’s quite hard to imagine placing a newborn on the toilet or potty. The recommended technique is to put your hands behind their knees and rest their body against your chest or in the crook of your arm. This puts them in a squat position that is great for getting everything out, including wind.
How do you do elimination communication at night?
Babies are more likely to urinate when wide awake or just waking up. When they are in the equivalent of an adult’s deep sleep, they tend not to wee. But obviously, babies, and especially small babies, don’t sleep all night long. Those that are nappy-free at night, say they keep a potty by the bed and have become very attuned to signs their baby needs to wee - like squirming or changes in breathing. I’m not saying this is nearly impossible for most but if you’re going to try it I highly recommend a waterproof sheet.
what do you need for elimination communication?
All you really need is somewhere for the baby to poo and wee. So a toilet or a potty. I did also find a list of clothes to make elimination communication easier. They suggested: leg warmers, thigh-high socks, Tiny Undies, crotchless pants and clothing that is easy to pull off quickly. I had to double-check that this was a clothing list for elimination communication and not a 1980s sex worker.
Most seem to use reusable nappies as a backup. This is good as it’s very hard to buy underpants for a newborn baby. Especially a newborn baby boy. And I’m almost certain you can’t get newborn crotchless pants. There is an American company called Tiny Undies, mentioned in the list above, which sells very small sizes of pants for nappy-free babies. They start at 6 months.
A good sling or carrier will be useful. Those that practice this method say that a lot of babywearing is perfect as babies tend to squirm in a sling when they need to wee or poo so it’s an easy sign to recognise.
If you’re using a potty, Born Ready, a British website dedicated to elimination communication, recommend buying lots of cheap potties and having one in every room. The very popular IKEA Lockvig potty has an insert that is ideal for newborns. Buy it in IKEA for £6 plus shipping or it is also available on Amazon.
when can you start doing elimination communication?
There’s no reason why you can’t start with a newborn. Actually, there are obviously hundreds of reasons why you can’t start with a newborn. One of which is that a newborn baby will wee around 20 times a day. Personally, I think that newborns have got other stuff to worry about like trying to hold their big heads up. But newborns have been successfully potty trained so it can be done.
are there any reasons why you shouldn’t do elimination communication?
One argument against this practice is that if a child is learning to hold their wee from a very young age this could be damaging for bladder development. It could also cause health problems like constipation and UTIs.
Others argue that while it may be common practice in developing countries, it does not fit into Western society as well. And especially if both parents work.
I think it definitely takes a certain kind of person to even attempt this. I am not that person. But maybe you are. Let me know your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.